Week 6: Tweet Roundup

What’s the difference between a regular old reality show and a national phenomenon? Twitter traffic, of course. No Monday night Bachelor-viewing session is complete without perusing Twitter for instant analysis and opinions of the 28 contestants who are vying for love. But who has time to comb every inch of the web for the wittiest comments? We do. Here they are, in one neat little package.

A VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: If you’re reading this on your phone and want to pause the slideshow, hold your finger down for a beat on the slideshow until it’s highlighted. Then click again. The pause function should pop up, which will allow you to scroll through. You can also scroll to the bottom and revert to the desktop version. You’ve got options, is what we’re saying!

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Week 5: Power Rankings

This week was the best week of our lives. Why, you ask? BECAUSE WE GOT TO TALK TO GRETCHEN WIENERS ON BACHELOR LIVE.

That’s right. We talked to the girl who’s totally rich because her dad invented Toaster Strudel. The girl whose hair is so big because it’s full of secrets. The girl who practically CAME UP WITH the word fetch.

This is what dreams are made of. And frankly, we’re still recovering a week later. It was a magical moment. And if you didn’t get to see how magical it was, you can watch the clip here.

But ANYWAY, we are not here to talk about our conversation with Gretchen Wieners. We are here to talk about Power Rankings. So let’s get to it!

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Week 5: Tweet Roundup

What’s the difference between a regular old reality show and a national phenomenon? Twitter traffic, of course. No Monday night Bachelor-viewing session is complete without perusing Twitter for instant analysis and opinions of the 28 contestants who are vying for love. But who has time to comb every inch of the web for the wittiest comments? We do. Here they are, in one neat little package.

A VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: If you’re reading this on your phone and want to pause the slideshow, hold your finger down for a beat on the slideshow until it’s highlighted. Then click again. The pause function should pop up, which will allow you to scroll through. You can also scroll to the bottom and revert to the desktop version. You’ve got options, is what we’re saying!

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Week 4: Power Rankings

Jambo!

We hope you guys stocked up on some extra wine this week, because after all the shenanigans that went down, it was much needed. There were people dressed in chicken suits. Half of the twin tandem was eliminated. And feather boas were carelessly tossed on the floor.

feather boa

These girls have reached a level of ridiculousness that has not been matched since Sean Lowe’s season. They’ve gone wild. The girls have gone wild.

So, let’s break it all down and see how this week’s rankings shake out, shall we? Let us begin!

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Week 4: Nothing stays in Vegas

PSA: What happens in Vegas does not stay in Vegas.

It comes back with you. And it usually ends with people (like us) making fun of you on the Internet.

Lots of women learned that this week as they watched their terrible talents, quickie weddings and general debauchery play out on national television. Naturally, we loved every minute of it. Let’s relive it, mmmmkay?

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Week 4: Tweet Roundup

What’s the difference between a regular old reality show and a national phenomenon? Twitter traffic, of course. No Monday night Bachelor-viewing session is complete without perusing Twitter for instant analysis and opinions of the 28 contestants who are vying for love. But who has time to comb every inch of the web for the wittiest comments? We do. Here they are, in one neat little package.

A VERY IMPORTANT NOTE: If you’re reading this on your phone and want to pause the slideshow, hold your finger down for a beat on the slideshow until it’s highlighted. Then click again. The pause function should pop up, which will allow you to scroll through. You can also scroll to the bottom and revert to the desktop version. You’ve got options, is what we’re saying!

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Week 3: Power Rankings

Guys, The Bachelor is back! And we don’t just mean back, as in it’s on our TV—we mean it’s BACK, as in it’s FINALLY returned to its original form.

For what felt like an eternity, we were forced to watch a cheap version of The Bachelor—low-budget dates, no helicopters, no hot tubs, fewer private concerts, low-budget destinations. Heck, sometimes they’d film in one destination for almost the entire season.

But now, the REAL Bachelor is back, and this episode had it all. Helicopters, airplanes, a hot tub in the middle of a field, private concerts, massages, lavish dates—we’re giddy just thinking about it.

And, of course, in between all that was drama, tears, fat toe-shaming and emotional exits. And we are here to break it all down in our latest Power Rankings:

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Week 3: Cankles and confrontations

It’s hard out here for a pimp lady with cankles.

Just ask Olivia. She had a rough week. You know who also had a rough time on this week’s Bachelor episode? Lace. Ben. Jubilee.

Basically, lots of people. But they’re pressing onward (except for Lace, but we’ll get to that later) and so shall we. To the recap!

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